This morning’s read Spiritual Growth: Being Your Higher Self by Sanaya Roman is exactly what I need in this moment. The chapter I am reading Going Through the Void speaks volumes to the space I am in right now.
I am examining every single relationship in my life right now.
Every single one. From family to friends to foe. I am realizing my issue is not with them but with myself. I am in a period of transition and change. I will not be the same person as I was 10, 5 or even 2 years ago. I have to let go of certain attachments. I may even have to let go certain relationships. This chapter is getting me to see: that is OK! I have been angry at myself for feeling this way (guilty about wanting to make changes that would make people mad at me)but I have also been weighed down by the resentment that I have due to not speaking my truth to begin with. Then again I have to overstand that I had to go through all of that in order to be who I am today. And I shouldn’t hate the space I am right now but rather appreciate it and look for opportunities to grow.
It’s not bad that I want to operate differently in my life. I should not stunt my growth just to maintain the comfort of others. I do not want implement a lot of the ways I handle situations in the past. I am going to speak up for myself even when it feels uncomfortable. I am going to establish new boundaries with family, friend and foe. I will not take personally their feelings. I will not silence myself because of fear, worry or retaliation. I am going to love myself unconditionally and not expect it from anyone else.
I know this is a journey. If I expect it to be easy then I am only fooling myself. It’s going to prayer, dedication, practice and lots of self-love. I know who my Higher Self is…and she is beautiful. I most certainly look forward to evolving into her. Oh wait, I am!
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